| Tooth Paste Shopping |
[Aug. 27th, 2008|06:27 pm] |
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So last night after I got home from work and did all the must do's, I got bored and when that happens with me it's not good. When I get bored or if I feel down I turn to my bad habit of then HAVING to go buy something. It's a habit my mom said she gave me because as a kid, whenever things weren't going so great we would always go shopping even if money was low and we had no business doing so. I get a very intense rush from buying random shit. It's impulse buying at it's worst an I have been trying to work on it. So I decide that I have to go to Books-A-Million (no idea why seeings that I'm not much of a reader) to waist some money (which I don't really have in abundance right now). As I am about to pull on the road to head to Books some unknown force (I think they call it common sense) kicks in and makes me stay straight and miss the turn and next thing I know I pull into Walmart. I decided that my small amount of funds would be better spent right now on things I really need like food, bottled water and the super important tooth paste. I just got my braces taken off last Monday and oddly enough I had had them on for eleven years. I know that sounds crazy. It was just a mix of missing appointments, moving pretty far out of town from my orhto and not really caring enough to remember to go have them off that kept them on so long. It was just the bottom brackets at least but either way, I know thats pretty ridiculous and I really feel bad about not taking care of it sooner. So as soon as they were taken off I'm thinking sweet...one less thing to worry about health wise. Wrong. Now for some reason after 11 years of no cavity's I think I have one. I have no health insurance right now (also stupid) but I'm taking care of that next month hopefully so until then I figured I'd try to use some good cavity fighting tooth paste. Maybe that will help somehow. Walking out of Walmart last night with a bag of things I needed, I realized that I spent the same as what I would have blown on stuff I didn't need at Books so I felt pretty good about myself. I think thats probably part of growing up. Making better choices even if it means I'm spending more time reading the backs of toothpaste packages instead of feeding my need to buy dumb but more exciting shit. I got some bow tie pasta and Alfredo sauce to cook for my girlfriend Friday. It is in fact the only thing I really know how to cook. Cooking...thats another thing I have to learn soon. At 25 years of age, sandwiches are starting to get old. |
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| Well... |
[Aug. 26th, 2008|06:29 pm] |
Today is Tuesday August 26th and today is the day I realized I have to start doing things differently or be doomed to stay stuck in a rut and waist my life by sitting around complaining about the same old shit. My job is ok. I like it because it's familiar to me and there is no major challenge. However...there is no reward. There is no chance for growth. So this job really just helps the sands in my personal hour glass fall faster and faster. I am 25 and the last 5 years have flown by too fast. Too little has got done. I had big dreams of making it in the music biz. The same dreams that make going to school for a degree and working harder on finding a more rewarding work position and other important decisions seem not so important and easily pushed aside. However for the past year, even though things have picked up and grown a lot with the music thing, I have been doubting this dream more than ever. Maybe I'm not ambitious enough for it or maybe I'm falling out of love with the idea of it in general. I wanted to be an actor at one point too but that dream also diminished and I worry that maybe I just cant stick with something long enough to reach success with it. I just want a rewarding exciting
career where I do something I can at least be proud of sometimes. Something where I feel my efforts equal something positive. In a few months I will be working a new job in the same building as a customer support agent for AT&T Mobile so hopefully that will be a big change and give me a taste of something new. As for now I can be happy that I have a B-E-A Utiful, smart and funny girlfriend and we are nearing our one year mark which is pretty exciting. She really is another whole blog though jam packed with happy thoughts and good feelings so I'm not complaining THAT much about my life. I am going to say that starting today I will work harder on finding that sense of adventure I use to have allot more of but seemed to lose over the past few years. I will work harder on seeing more new stuff and meeting more people, making more friends and trying new things an also being more responsible with my time. Wish me luck! |
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